Retail Lessons

          Here are a few lessons I have learned in my 15 years of retail experience.

1. Some customers are so crazy it's easier to give them what they want and get them to leave.
2. Customers think everything should be on sale all the time or that they can haggle to get a discount.
3. If it's not tied down it will be stolen. Even if it's tied down it MIGHT be stolen.
4. Grapes have no value and can be eaten freely while shopping.
5. All electric carts will suddenly run out of power on the back aisle of the store or at the bottom of the parking lot.
6. Some coworkers are aware they are paid by the hour and will do as little as possible in that hour.
7. Thanksgiving deals are not worth the chaos in stores. Stay home and shop online.
8. Nothing ever goes back into a box as neatly as it came out of a box. Customers will want you to open a box to verify it contains all the parts but will want to purchase a closed box.
9. If you see something you want, buy it right then. When you come back it will be out of stock or discontinued.
10. Stay in your original checkout line. If you change to one that seems faster, it will have an issue that makes it take forever.
11. People get turned on by weird stuff. Some will touch or expose themselves in public.
12. If bathrooms are unavailable, people will go anywhere that is available.
13. Customers will swear that you moved items for the sole purpose of confusing them.
14. Apparel sizes mean nothing. The only way to tell if an item will fit, whether it be a t-shirt or prepackaged underwear, is to unfold it and hold it up to your body.
15. If you decide you aren't get enough stuff to bother with a cart, you will be dropping items all the way back to the front to go get a cart or check out.
16. Customers will make any mess or cause you any inconvenience and justify it by saying it's job security for you.
17. Nothing is actually non-refundable. It just requires a big enough manager's approval.
18. Blizzards, loss of power, bomb threats, and child labor all are meaningless when a customer "has to get" their items. They will refuse to evacuate the store. They will refuse to go to the register until they have everything they "need." They will even give birth in the store for fear of not being able to purchase Newborn diapers before they go to the hospital.

          These are just a few retail lessons I have learned. Feel free to discuss your experiences with them or other lessons learned in the comments below.